I have been accused of being passive-aggressive for writing letters to my bosses when there are specific issues I feel need to be addressed (and no one else will talk to management about them because they're smart enough to know management doesn't care). I'm a little confused by the way this term is used.
From what I understand, a passive-aggressive response to, say, her terrible, are-you-seriously-a-college-graduate constant grammar/spelling/syntax errors would be to put a stack of hilarious and difficult to understand memos and emails on her chair with grammar and style comments marked in red and place a copy of "I Judge You When You Use Poor Grammar" on top of the pile.
I consider writing an essay with bullet points and formatting designed to clearly communicate problems and proposed solutions to be a form of properly documented alternative conflict resolution. (Except that it never works because getting any kind of response in writing is impossible, thus making the whole exercise pointless.)
Am I really being passive aggressive? Is the only correct way to air grievances (especially to an illogical, combative, defensive, incompetent boss) to have a conversation that escalates into a shouting match that could get me fired? If it is, I'd rather be passive aggressive and have all those letters formally on file for my defense should the time come.
In your opinion, where is the line for passive-aggressive behavior?
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Well, this seems to be the pop culture understanding of passive-aggressiveness: http://mthruf.com/tag/passive-aggressive/
ReplyDeleteProperly speaking, though, it seems to mean general uncooperativeness born out of negative feelings- Merriam-Webster gives procrastination and stubbornness as examples. Seems to me that writing a letter (especially one that's signed) is more low-risk-confrontational than passive-aggressive.
Writing a letter would become even less passive-aggressive if you personally hand it to your boss and explain that it's easier for you to express yourself in writing, or something.
ReplyDeleteLiz, your link was pretty funny, especially the picture of before and after with the little anime figures . . . :)
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