31 July 2012

young and grey

I am moving much less
like a woman of 60
these days (except for
the left arm, hip, and
lower back), but the silver
is taking over my hair
that much faster.  An 
odd tradeoff, but not 
unwelcome, I suppose.

25 July 2012

the impossible dream

to OWCP with bitterness

I wake up
in the morning,
and I feel rested. 

I get up
and go
about my day,

and I
am not
in pain.

22 July 2012

17 July 2012

the view today

one set of windows
shows a sky mostly cloudy

while another shows sun
and blue sky I guess

today I get to choose

15 July 2012

loving the darkness

I don't want to turn
on the lights because 
it will be harder
to see the rain

10 July 2012

dead lilacs

The thing about lilacs
is that after they're dead
they still smell like heaven
for some time

07 July 2012

02 July 2012

What I wanted to do that day

What I want to do is huddle on the couch watching the wind whip through the cottonwoods listening to the sound of the leaves and the rain drizzling down, just existing, not trying to distract myself from the pain or discomfort or the fever, not trying to accomplish anything, letting my thoughts drift instead of constantly yanking them back on course of necessity.  I want to watch the clouds move past in ragged layers in the sky and see if the sun will ever come out today.